Thursday, January 21, 2010

Surprise Inspection!

You know that old saying, “Always make sure you’re wearing clean underwear just in case you get into an accident?” I always wondered what that really meant. Does it mean if you don’t have on clean underwear and you get into an accident an ambulance won’t pick you up and take you to the hospital? Will they actually check to see whether or not you have on clean underwear before treating you at the scene? Would they leave you just lying there on the road to die or would they call for emergency clean underwear to be brought to the scene of the accident?

Either way, I believe my mother came up with that saying. She’s a firm believer in always having clean underwear on hand. She actually carries a pair of clean underwear in her purse, just in case she gets into an accident. That way there would be no need for emergency clean underwear to be brought to the scene. She would have underwear right there in her purse. I’m surprised she doesn’t wear one of those medical alert wrist bands that says, “Clean underwear in my purse. Please make sure I’m wearing them before transporting me to the hospital.”


When we were very young, my mother took my sister and I shopping. We were shopping for clothes and my mom found something she wanted to try on Robbie Lee. I waited outside the door while my mom pulled Robbie into the dressing room. Suddenly I heard this horrific scream from my mom, “You’re not wearing any underwear! Where’s your underwear?”

Robbie Lee was notorious for sneaking out of the house butt naked at times when she was a child and I guess she took great pleasure out of going shopping without her underwear.

“I forgot to put some on, Mom” said Robbie Lee, pleading her case.

“How could you leave the house without underwear?” my mom asked. “It’s too hot to wear underwear,” announced Robbie Lee.

I stood outside the door feeling proud that I had remembered to wear my underwear. Mom stormed out of the dressing room with Robbie Lee in tow. I ran to keep up as Mom sprinted to the children’s underwear section and grabbed the first pair of underwear she came to.

“Lift up your leg,” said Mom. I couldn’t believe my eyes. Mom was putting the new underwear on Robbie right there in the store. I stood by quietly watching and hoping no one else would see. Robbie Lee had a frown on her face like she was being tortured or something. I just wanted them to hurry up so we could go home.

“There, that’s better,” declared Mom, checking out the fit. With that, she was off to finish her shopping.


When we went through the checkout, Mom placed all the items she had picked out on the counter. Then just as the cashier was ringing up the last item, Mom lifted Robbie Lee’s little dress, revealing the brand new underwear and said, “I also want to buy these.”

The cashier looked stunned. My face felt like it would catch on fire, but there was nowhere to hide. Robbie helped Mom hold up her dress, waiting patiently for the cashier to decide the price of the underwear she was wearing. Mom didn’t even flinch. She seemed oblivious to my red face. I guess she was a Mom on a mission and wasn’t worrying about being embarrassed. The cashier finally decided on the price of the underwear, we paid and left the store to go home. I felt that Mom shouldn’t have paid full price for the underwear. After all, Robbie had already worn them for nearly an hour.

Isn’t it great to know that God will never lift the curtain and reveal our past sins? I’ve talked to a lot of Christians who struggle with their past and the things they’ve done before they accepted Christ. They find it hard to believe that God has completely forgiven them and they keep waiting for Him to tap them on the shoulder and say, “Remember those terrible things you did many years ago?”

Romans 8:1-2 says, “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death.”

Stop waiting for the other shoe to drop. God is not going to suddenly reveal all of your sins to everyone around you. That’s the beauty of the cross. God looks at you with Jesus colored glasses. When He sees you He doesn’t see the sins of your past. He sees His Son, Jesus in you. Your sins are forgotten. I reckon it’s time you forget them too. How can you see what God has planned for your future if you’re so busy looking behind you?

Oh yeah, and if you see my mother in a shopping mall, walk the other way. Otherwise you might be subjected to a surprise inspection.

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